mitgefühl, with feeling

compassion, mit gefühl

I’ve read Milan Kundera’s “The Unbearable Lightness of Being” and i labelled it as one of the best reads of 2022. He often hints at the German language and how linguistics can change the actual description of a feeling, an emotion. Please read following quote about the word “compassion”:

All languages that derive from Latin form the word 'compassion' by combining the prefix meaning 'with' (com-) and the root meaning 'suffering' (Late Latin, passio). In other languages- Czech, Polish, German, and Swedish, for instance- this word is translated by a noun formed of an equivalent prefixcombined with the word that means 'feeling' (Czech, sou-cit; Polish, wsspół-czucie; German, Mit-gefühl; Swedish, medkänsla).

In languages that derive from Latin, 'compassion' means: we cannot look on coolly as others suffer; or, we sympathize with those who suffer. Another word with approximately the same meaning, 'pity' (French, pitié; Italian, pietà; etc.), connotes a certain condescension towards the sufferer. 'To take pity on a woman' means that we are better off than she, that we stoop to her level, lower ourselves.

That is why the word 'compassion' generally inspires suspicion; it designates what is considered an inferior, second-rate sentiment that has little to do with love. To love someone out of compassion means not really to love.

In languages that form the word 'compassion' not from the root 'suffering' but from the root 'feeling', the word is used in approximately the same way, but to contend that it designates a bad or inferior sentiment is difficult. The secret strength of its etymology floods the word with another light and gives it a broader meaning: to have compassion (co-feeling) means not only to be able to live with the other's misfortune but also to feel with him any emotion- joy, anxiety, happiness, pain. This kind of compassion (in the sense of soucit, współczucie, Mitgefühl, medkänsla) therefore signifies the maximal capacity of affective imagination, the art of emotional telepathy. In the hierarchy of sentiments, then, it is supreme.

~ Milan Kundera, “The Unbearable Lightness of Being”

I have a lot of Mitgefühl with myself at the moment. Y’know, not only compassion, but I feel with myself. I let everything float through me. I don’t use the word “falling” when describing in love, I use “drowning” cause that’s how my love feels at the moment. I don’t smile excessively just to please others in a boring conversation. I get quiet if I feel unheard around people. I am not here on this earth to please everyone, I am here to please myself with delicious delightful moments, memories, poetry & experiences.