how are you? *sigh*
a helpless hopeful child
I’ve subconsciously stopped replying to the question “How are you?” or its variation “What’s up?”. First, I noticed the grip on my neck it leaves almost like bruises. I care enough to not get bruised by such a simple question like that.
But is “How are you?” such a simple question?
We’ve definitely made it as an opening like “Oh, I’m good - how are you?”. After that we actually talk about what we wanted to in the first place or just continue to chat. It’s a friendly gesture, I agree.
Still, I feel the grip as soon as glancing at my phone screen and seeing the question.
i’ve started sleeping with the lights on
sometimes since you’ve gone
but you still star in every dream
my cosmic memory
my mind glitches out like a rented VHS
I feel very lonely currently. Not in a sense of having no one around me. Well, I arrived back home with my parents. I dream of taking the car and driving to a city *nearby* and sitting there, writing and daydreaming - as I am used to doing when I’m gone in other countries with other languages (and kinder people).
I feel lonely in my mind, in my feelings, in my life. I know I’m not alone, so many people go through similar situations as I do currently (insert any sort of situation and the result stays the same). I feel a great solitude in my heart. My sleep enters my room by 4am and then I even struggle to let go of everything. I stopped dreaming.